Monday, March 31, 2014


 hay guise 2day im gonna share a recipee wit u all for my favorit recipe its TOAST!!1

so toastt is so eazy to maik but sumtimes it can seem liek its not so eazy but its ok just stay wit me ok??

first u gotta get yr bred and your butter PROTIP if u use spread butter it wont run yr TOAST!!1 i jus hate wen you got toast and then it is gets all broke bcuz you press with the nife too hard u kno?

k enuff about that here is the recipee!!!

Things U Need
-yr favorit bred

-toaster (or toasterr oven leik I have here)
-plate for wen toadt is done
-nife for butter

-mak sure yr bred is no moldy. moldy bred is ugh.,

-put bred in toaster or if yu hav a toaster oven use taht bcuz thats whut i have here

-toast bred yu don want it not toasted but you dont want it burnt so watch it close unles u like burnd bred but i dont

-PPut butter on toast and let it melt a littel so its all melty


PROTIP it can be glutin free if yu use glutin free bred but it migt taste a lil differint.

u culd use penut butters but jam too

its so good and for brekfest or maybe use for sandwich for lunch or BRUNCH cuz brunch is best its liek brekfest AND lunch so good.

IF YOU LYKE DIS RECIPEE U SHULD SHARE IT ON STUFF! Pintrest is best xuz theres lots of kool stuff on here!1

*APRIL FOOLS*I just tried to put together the worst recipe and writing style I could think of. Full disclosure: I actually feel bad for Fake Ashley who wrote this, she just really loves that toast and wants to share it with the world! ...seriously though, that was so difficult to write. I kept having to go back and misspell things because I was on autopilot.

I was inspired by the messages I used to get on my old dating profile, heh.

Did any of you get fooled today? I'd love to hear about it!

Sunday, March 23, 2014

Jaeger Schnitzel -- Kitchen Wins

So, I know I said the potato chips would be the next recipe I post BUT I couldn't keep this one in any longer. Potato chips will be coming soon, no worries. Or, I might make it a Facebook-exclusive recipe... we'll see. Anyway.

Most recipes I make are new recipes. Something I've never tried, with new ingredients or using new techniques. Often, I end up with something that may or may not be tasty, but definitely isn't photo-worthy. When the stars align and somehow it all comes together and I create a recipe that is a success both taste-and-visually? It's cause for celebration.

As was the case with this jaeger schnitzel (weiner schnitzel with mushroom sauce). Before I left western Massachusetts, I had a divine meal at a German restaurant and got this amazing dish. Ever since, I'd been toying with it in my mind to make it tummy-friendly for my gluten sensitivity.

The Fiancé even devoured this dish!--not a TOTAL surprise, since it didn't really have any veggies, but still. When he fills his plate and goes back for more you know it's a win.

When it works, it just works. This meal is incredible. Next time I'll toy with trying to make spaetzle, but I didn't quite have the time this go around. I left in the dairy, even though that doesn't always agree with me, and the flavor was definitely worth it.

The directions are a little involved, but overall it's a very easy recipe! I had most of these things on hand, too, so the whole process took about 20 minutes. A great idea for a quick, easy, DELICIOUS dinner :)

Jaeger Schnitzel (Gluten Free)
(Inspired by this recipe)

  • 4 large boneless, skinless pork chops, pounded thin with a mallet to 1/4" thickness
  • 1 cup almond meal
  • 3 tbs gluten free flour
  • 2 tsp cajun seasoning or cayenne pepper
  • 1/4 tsp. salt
  • 1/4 tsp ground pepper
  • 1 egg
  • 2 tbs butter
  • 1 tbs olive oil

For the Sauce

  • 1 small onion, chopped
  • 2 tbs butter
  • 1/5 cups mushrooms, sliced
  • 1/2 cup chicken broth
  • 1/2 cup white wine (I used chardonnay)
  • 1/2 cup + 2 tsp heavy cream
  • 2 tbs corn starch
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1/4 tsp pepper
  • 3 tbs parsley, freshly chopped

-Melt 2 tablespoons butter with olive oil in skillet.

-Mix together almond flour, salt, pepper, and cajun seasoning in one bowl. Spread gluten-free flour on a plate. Lightly coat each thin chop with the gluten free flour, then dip into the egg wash, and finally coat generously with the almond meal mixture.

-Place breaded chops two by two in your skillet and cook each side until crispy--about 3-4 minutes per side. Put on a paper-towel lined plate and keep warm while you prepare the sauce.

-For the sauce: cook onion until translucent and add sliced mushrooms, let cook until the mushrooms are just soft.

-Add broth and wine, cook until steaming. Add 1/2 cup of the cream, bring to a boil and simmer for several minutes.

-Mix remaining 2 tablespoons of cream with 2 tablespoons of corn starch. Add slurry to mushroom mixture and bring to a boil, stirring vigorously to avoid clumps. Add parsley, salt and pepper to taste.

-Serve with mushroom sauce spooned over cutlets. Traditionally with a potato side dish, or as I've done here with a big helping of buttered peas.

Monday, March 17, 2014

Zesty Hamburger Soup

How have I never blogged this recipe? I've been making it for YEARS, definitely years before I was ever flooding the internet with recipes. It was probably the second meal I learned to make from memory as an adult, the first being my version of my mom's famous Baked Mac and Cheese.

I made a big batch of this soup when it was chilly a few weeks ago--true Austinites were bundled up in their parkas but I was doing okay with just a fleece, I guess my "Texas skin" just hasn't come in yet--and now the sun is back and temps are creeping back up.

However, if my Facebook newsfeed is to be believed, my New England friends are still toughing it through the Polar Vortex, so I'm sure this soup will be well received.

This makes a huge batch, but it freezes well. I kept a good stock of it in my college apartment's freezer and pulled it out when I didn't have the time or money to grocery shop.

This soup is very hearty, just a little bit spicy, and these days I eliminate the noodles, so it's also gluten free! I imagine if you're paleo-ing it up you could sub out the white potatoes for sweet, and get rid of the corn. Either way, it's pretty freaking delicious.

Zesty Hamburger Soup
(I believe the original recipe was from Home Comfort)

  • 1 pound ground beef (also can substitute ground turkey)
  • 2 cups sliced celery
  • 1 cup sliced baby carrots
  • 1 cup onion
  • 2 tsp garlic
  • 4 cups hot chicken broth 
  • 2 medium red potatoes, cubed
  • 2 cups frozen corn
  • 2 cups uncooked shell pasta
  • 4 cups V8 juice
  • 1.5 cans diced tomatoes with green chiles
  • 1 tbs sugar
  • Hot sauce (as much or as little as you'd like--I like it spicy so I use a lot, plus a little cayenne pepper)

-Cook beef, celery, carrots, and onion over medium heat until meat is browned. Add the garlic and mix in.

-Drain the fat, then mix in broth, potatoes, corn, hot sauce, and pasta.

-Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer 10-15 minutes or until the potatoes and pasta are cooked to your liking (I'm not a fan of al dente so I go for the full 15 to get them a little softer)

-Add the rest of the ingredients (V8, diced tomatoes, and sugar) and heat over medium until heated through.*

Garnish with a little bit of fresh parmesan cheese.
*If you'd like to add noodles, do so at this point. If you are freezing, make noodles separately and keep out of the portions you're freezing.

Monday, March 10, 2014

Austin Eats Roundup 1

It's SXSW here in Austin, which means a huge influx of people to our little big city. Lots of people returning for the fest, lots of newbies, and I'm sure EVERYONE is wondering where the best places to eat are!

I decided it was worth mentioning a few of my favorites. I'm a new Austinite, so these are the places I've tried so far and really enjoyed--not necessarily a "local's POV" just yet, but I'm kind of a foodie and definitely on a budget, so you might find my suggestions helpful :)

I might also do a round up of the more "splurge" ish joints I've been to, keep an eye out! You also may have seen some of these in my past Austin Roundups.

Tex Mex

I am a die-hard Chuy's addict. I've heard mixed reviews from locals, but to me, it just has everything: fun and funky atmosphere, extensive menu with many options in a range of prices, tasty food, and free chips. Plus, it's the best queso I've ever had (and I've been judging places pretty harshly based on queso options). I've never had a bad meal here, and I've been about five times since moving to Austin. I know I need to try more places to get a better informed opinion, but the bottom line is: if you want an Austin experience, tasty Tex Mex, and free chips, this is your place. I suggest getting a side of creamy jalapeno dressing with your chips and trying the Chicka-Chicka-Boom-Boom enchilada. You won't be sorry. Arrive early for Happy Hour, when margaritas are $3.50!

Torchy's Tacos are great if you want a quick taco that tastes gourmet. They also have perfected the art of the breakfast taco--if I had my choice I'd do breakfast here and lunch/dinner at Chuy's every single day. There are multiple locations with the hovering devil baby logo looming over the entrance. I am in love with their street corn, and often just get this and nothing else. I suggest the street corn (duh.), the Wrangler (breakfast) and the Ranch Hand (lunch). Plus their sodas are local and natural, so that's always a plus!

...and if any Austinites are reading this and want to direct me towards your favorite Tex Mex place, PLEASE leave it in the comments! I've only tried a few others but these are still my winners :)

Food Trucks

Gotta give some love to Fried and True, always. Check out my full review on my first Austin roundup. Arielle is lovely and hilarious, and happens to be from the same neck of the woods (Western Massachusetts!) as me :) Get the corn dog with deep fried oreos for dessert and know what heaven is.

Also much love to Ms. P's Electric Cock. Did a full review recently, check it out. Basically: Best fried chicken in the city.

Chi'lantro is a drunchie paradise (drunchies = munchies + drunk). Located near the infamous Dirty 6 (6th Street) the line is endless once the bars let out. Thankfully, I got to try their famous kimchi fries while sober, so I could fully enjoy them and not have to wait in line. The orange sauce is so delicious I want to freaking BATHE in it. Eat quickly, as the fries will get soggy, and definitely share with friends because the portion is huge. My friend got the Quesadillas and while she saved me a triangle, after the fries I couldn't handle anything else. She says they were as good as they looked, though.

Picknik is a paleo food truck. I've only been here once, but the soup was so delicious it's definitely worth a mention. And since I do my own half-assed paleo thing most of the time, it's nice to know there's a place I can go and get a Paleo meal. It's expensive, but delicious. And worth a try whether you're on the diet or not. The bulletproof coffee gets stellar reviews but I was more of a fan of the Yeti coffee "milkshake." The offerings change daily.

"Fast Food"

P. Terry's or In-n-Out. I'm sure there's more, but if you're from anywhere that doesn't have either of these heavenly burgers, you need to check them out. I am an In-n-Out loyalist and nothing can compare to me, but P.Terry's has a location closer to me, so when I'm craving burgers they typically win. Honorable mention to Mighty Fine Burgers for having a gluten free bun!


I haven't tried Franklin's yet, because I haven't had a free Saturday to waste 3 hours waiting in line. However, these are my faves so far.

Salt Lick in Driftwood (previous review here) is the place we take out-of-towners. It's delicious BBQ and a pretty fun experience. It's a long, scenic drive, and an even longer wait if you come on a busy weekend night. However, they offer lemonade and popcorn to ease the wait, and usually have live music playing. Plus there's a little place next door where you can taste wine and buy beer to go with your meal. I've never had a bad meal here.

Rudy's is definitely more accessible, a little less expensive, and just as delicious if not moreso. You can find them off most of the major highways in town. Look for the gas stations with Rudy's but don't worry--this isn't your typical gas station quality food. You pay by the pound and get served on parchment paper. The sides are a little underwhelming (I get the cole slaw, it's decent) but the perfectly smoked meat more than makes up for it. Top with the BBQ sauce from the table and it's just out of this world.

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Fat Tuesday Cake

Happy Fat Tuesday, everyone! My goal is to be in New Orleans for this next year (Bucket List: be present for a Mardi Gras while I can still be mistaken for a college student), but at this rate I'll have to start saving for that adventure NOW... or like, six months ago, so oh well.

Actually, this isn't a celebratory cake at all. I literally forgot what day it was until TODAY when all the blogs flooded the internet with beignets and king cakes and all those holiday-appropriate foods. This was simply an "I Deserve a Cake" cake.

The traditional King cakes freak me out because I have a wicked aversion to plastic in or near my food, and with a King Cake you never know if you're going to get a surprise tiny plastic baby in your cake. This is apparently good luck? Ew no. Reusable plastic dinnerware grosses me out, I'm convinced the plastic fumes will flavor my food *gag*, and the idea of a plastic baby all up in my cake makes me feel sick.

I am weird and have weird phobias, okay? Large images of space are another one. Keep me far away from planetariums, thanks.

So no, no King Cake for this lady. Just an HEB gluten free box cake mix. And homemade frosting. And some sprinkles, to be fancy about it all and maybe vaguely give a nod to the upcoming St. Patrick's Day holiday that is coming up even though the sprinkles are from Christmas.

For gluten free, this is more than decent. And only ballpark $3 at HEB, it's a total steal. I am in love with HEB.

Actually, just about any cake tastes awesome with marshmallow frosting. Frosting I specifically spooned on to look RUSTIC, and not because I suck at decorating cakes, heh.

Full disclosure: I ate a slice of cake for dinner last night. Because I'm an ADULT and I can do that.

Marshmallow Buttercream Frosting

  • 2 sticks butter, room temp
  • 1 jar marshmallow cream
  • 2 cups+ confectioners sugar
  • 3 tbs milk
  • 1 tsp vanilla extract

-In a stand or hand mixer, whip butter until light and fluffy. Add marshmallow creme and slowly add confectioners sugar until mixture has about doubled in size.

-Slowly add milk until desired consistency is reached. Add vanilla.

-Frost a cake.

Monday, March 3, 2014

What I'm Doing When I'm Not Here -- TabbedOut

A sort-of review, but moreso an informative post about a really useful app.

So, full disclosure: I work for TabbedOut. They aren't paying me to write this, they didn't tell me to write this, but they do employ me and maybe that's subliminally influencing my words here, so fair warning. However, even if I didn't work there, I honestly would be using this app. It's a Foodie's dream come true (not to mention a bar hopper's dream as well) and I thought that I'd share it with you so you know what I've been up to in the real world since it hasn't been a lot of blogging lately.

When I accepted the job at TabbedOut, I also had another job opportunity at a more corporate situation. I decided to take this job because it's a fun startup environment and it's directly related to food and drinks, which are obviously my favorite things ever. A friend said it best when they told me "You moved to Austin for the experience of living here, and working at a startup is a big part of that." I can gain experience in my field, learn a ton, and have fun doing it. Plus the resident office dog is ADORABLE.

How the app works: You download the app (Android, iPhone), put in your credit card info (military-grade encryption keeps it safe, no worries), and then find your favorite restaurant or bar. Once there, open your tab, and tell your server/bartender your TabbedOut number, or in most cases just your name. They add your food and drinks to your tab, and when you're ready to go you hit "Pay Tab" and leave at your leisure. A sliding tip field is included, and it defaults to 20%, and when you've completed payment you can even leave a little note for the restaurant to let them know what you thought of your experience.

The screen when you've paid,
and the field for a short review.

If you're using it for your own personal pub crawl, and you accidentally leave without hitting "pay," no worries! The bartender or server simply closes your tab at the end of the night or the end of their shift and the tip is the default.

Some people I work with at a TabbedOut event

I've only ever left my credit card at the bar once, but that was still a scary experience. When I first got to Austin my credit card info was stolen on 6th Street via a scanner, and THAT also sucked a ton. With TabbedOut, this fear is nonexistent. You can literally leave your wallet behind (unless you're me and get carded for anything that requires you to be 18+ because apparently I'm never going to look like an adult?) and still be able to pay for your drinks.

Plus, you can get offers sent right to your phone. No printing out coupons, you don't even have to show the server your screen, the offer is automatically deducted from your total.

The offer is in green,
automatically deducted from the bill.

TabbedOut isn't offered everywhere, but it's growing every day. We're in most major cities, and you can find out exactly where on our website. Each week we have a weekly meeting and it's only positive news. More locations, more tabs, more users. I love working here and feeling like I'm actually contributing to something great--it's a wonderful feeling.

I'm really enjoying my time here, and definitely enjoying using this app! If you're a blogger and feel like trying it out, please let me know and I'll make sure we give you a shout out on our social media. Email me if you'd like more information as well! quarterlifecrisiscuisine (at) gmail (dot) com.